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To Ferberize or Not to Ferberize..

 There's no question..Ferberize..!!

When my son was quite a bit younger and Red and I were still patrolling our room like night watchmen, we were advised to Ferberize him and Ferberize him good!

It was less to do with my being maternal and more to do with a child who didn't understand much of what was going on around him and his two main supports just up and leaving him to cry. So we decided against it and it's only of late that we've felt that the decision was largely an emotional one and not a logical one.

Now that the offspring can practically run around and has given into his intrinsic urge to climb everything climbable, he detests being restrained in any manner unless he's assured of perpetual motion and entertainment. Yeah right! What do I have? Cirque du Soleil in my livingroom? Pshaw!
Anyhow, in order to go and do anything at all these days means having him as my shadow. Normally I wouldn't mind a shadow as cute as him and neither would I mind the constant babble an irritant, but the reaching of his often extends to things harmful for him and a refusal leads to feet stamping and whining.

I can't stand whiny kids. I cant stand mine a tad bit more because he's the cutest most aww le mummum baby in the whole wide world. But even then it's really pushing it when it goes on beyond a point.

So today I left him in his cot and walked around doing some stuff around the house and ignored him. When he started to screech and get red in the face I walked out of the room and half closed the door behind me. He retaliated by gagging himself. When that didn't work ( I peeked to make sure he wasn't throwing up) he finally pulled out the Brahmastra! he called to me plaintively and said "Mamma"...damn that kid! He's good. But I'm better...marginally.

I took him out of his cot expecting to be hugged and exchange kisses and clean his runny nose, when Lo and Behold! The lil dumpling laughed through his tears and clapped his hands.

Now, in time every kid learns that you shouldn't mess with the Mommy person. And so did my kid. But being the ace that he is, am sure that particular point will have to be reinforced daily for the next 2 weeks, at least!
I promptly put him back in the cot, picked up a novel and sat right in front of him reading and oh! did I mention I got myself some tea to add insult to the injury?
So there I was, sipping, reading and ignoring to my heart's content.

He stamped his feet, held his breath, banged his chin against the cot rails and then quietened down and played with his toys till he really got sleepy. Tiny arms were then held out and truce was declared and the Geneva Convention between mother and son was signed.

He now sleepeth and I am left, yet again, marveling at how far ahead kids can think!
But it's like I told Red later, if the kid's old enough to plot how to bamboozle, then he's jolly well old enough to be hoisted on his own petard!

But on a less vengeful note, it makes sense I think for a child to be able to self-soothe. Not because I'm not going to be around or because if I nurture him now it'll spoil him for life. No. The earlier he can self-soothe the faster his own comfort occurs he's a happy baby again. It never hurts to be able to take care of yourself. Even from the cradle onwards.

Now lemme go cry to my mommy about the hard knocks in my life ;)

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
smittenbyu
Jan. 4th, 2011 02:44 pm (UTC)
we get the whole thing too... let her cry it out... during the day I don't run to her every whine and cry.... just make sure she is safe and get to her after my bathroom run or whatever I am in the middle of. But that's only been in the last month, where she does quit crying, etc. after a few moments - with a distraction. But if she doesn't, I pick her up.

At night, we don't let her cry it out. It just doesn't make sense for us. She has no understanding of what we are doing and so we pushing off the inevitable to maybe when she is 10-11 months. Apparently at 2 years they really test your limits!! sigh... oh and she is teething... sigh... we think our lives are tough! ;)
fortunatecave
Jan. 8th, 2011 05:36 am (UTC)
I hear you...
But the terrible twos apparently start a lot before they hit the 24 months milestone and believe you me, there's NO set pattern...why just last night Red and I were up all night, zombieing ourselves because our son just couldn't sleep. Initially he wanted to play but then it turned into crying.

Red was up most of the night walking with him and for some of the time the monkey slept on my chest. He did sleep but he's not an infant anymore so his pressure registers on my body a lot more than it used to earlier.

But keep at it, everyday's different..and they'll come to identify a pattern of their own. God only know they won't let you choose one for them :(
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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fortunatecave
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